Love is what we all really do strive for. Feeling it, having it and it is a life goal for many. We are made up of a consciousness that is ultimately love in the purest form. The majority of us that is in a good frame of mind desires more love, to give and receive. Love is a set of emotions and behaviors characterized by many things such as passion, intimacy and commitment. It involves a good feeling that can be described as caring, closeness, protectiveness, attraction, affection, lust and trust. Love can vary in intensity and can change over time. It is associated with a range of positive emotions, including happiness, excitement, life satisfaction, exuberance and euphoria, but it can also result in negative emotions such as jealousy, hardship and stress. When it comes to love, many people can agree that it is one of the most important of human emotions. Despite being one of the most studied behaviors on this planet, it is still the least understood and the most sought out. For example, researchers debate whether love is a biological or cultural phenomenon.
Love is most likely influenced and propitiated by both biology and culture. Many kinds of culture such as geographical location, family culture/nature and social influence. Although hormones and biology are important, the way we express and experience love is so influenced by our personal conceptions of love through culture and social aspects of influence. Where does consciousness come into play with Love? Consciosuness and love As a life coach and holistic practitioner I have absolutely no hesitation in saying that these are two of the most important ingredients to living in a beautiful, peaceful, passion filled life. Love: our inner awareness of joy and fulfillment, its a feeling that cannot be denied. Consciousness: our inner awareness of how we – and others around us – feel in the present moment. There is a scale to living in a conscious life (aware and sensitive) or in a conscientious way (careful and scrupulous). However, the act of conscious love is full of intent. To understand conscious love, we must begin to perceive love as a verb. Something we consciously give. Don't you think? It is best to understand and love yourself. In so many ways, the love we give to others can be a reflection of how we feel about ourselves. Perhaps you’ve noticed that it’s difficult to fully give your love if you don’t deem yourself worthy of receiving it in return. You can seek assistance in life coaching or therapy to learn how to value yourself, accept your imperfections and unapologetically share your love expression with the world. This should absolutely be an aspiration and ambition of yours, if not only for your own inner peace and joy, but also so you can share your love fully and completely with those closest to you. The smallest of things like telling people you believe in them is love, sharing what they did to inspire you and lifting them up during hard times is love. Being loving can be contagious also...know that. To be kind is loving. Remember it’s easy to get complacent and take the people we love for granted. Have intention to offer nice gestures today and always in small ways such as such as treating a friend to lunch, going for a walk together or writing them a note of gratitude. A great first step to conscious love is to learn to be more present. When you’re spending time together, spend it without distractions. When they talk, engage in active listening. Do what you can to limit your inner dialogue and remain in the moment with them. Meditation is a great practice to help you improve conscious loving. It might not seem like much, but presence can really help improve how people feel when they’re around you. One thing that people say about me as a holistic practitioner and intuitive life coach is how they feel when they are in my presence. I genuinely care and it shows through my eyes, voice and kind gestures. We can all operate like that. Every human in this universe wants to feel heard, respected, like they matter. It’s in our nature. Presence is one of the easiest and best ways to help others feel like that. Why do you think we say “it’s the thought that counts” when referring to gifts? We mean that the act of making someone feel treasured, unique and special is often better than the gift itself. Self-understanding and awareness is a key factor in the journey to loving others more consciously. Often, we hold onto past trauma and circumstances and allow unhealed wounds to block us from giving and receiving love (being or feeling vulnerable). Perhaps someone made us feel unworthy of love in the past. Maybe these feelings prevent you from giving love to your full potential. This is common. We all pick up and carry emotional crutches or blocks from time to time, and this can make it difficult to extend and connect with others throughout our life. One could say, to be in love is a vulnerable place, but it is so worth it! Many say that communication is one of the most crucial pillars to a thriving relationship. Indeed, it absolutely is one of the easiest ways to ensure that the other person will get everything they need from you – and vice versa. When you both feel free to say what you need, what and why – and are willing to change to help your partner or significant other get what they need – there’s little else in this world stopping you from thriving together What are some of the signs of love? Researchers have made distinctions between feelings of liking and loving another person. According to psychologist Zick Rubin, romantic love is made up of three elements:
Attachment: Needing to be with another person and desiring physical contact and approval
Caring: Valuing the other person's happiness and needs as much as your own
Intimacy: Sharing private thoughts, feelings, and desires with the other person
Based on this view of romantic love, Rubin developed two questionnaires to measure these variables. Whereas people tend to view people they like as pleasant, love is marked by being devoted, possessive, and confiding in one another. So therefore there is a difference.
Types of Love
Not all forms of love are the same, and psychologists have identified a number of different types of love that people may experience.
Friendship: This type of love involves liking someone and sharing a certain degree of intimacy.
Infatuation: This is a form of love that often involves intense feelings of attraction without a sense of commitment; it often takes place early in a relationship and may deepen into a more lasting love.
Passionate love: This type of love is marked by intense feelings of longing and attraction; it often involves an idealization of the other person and a need to maintain constant physical closeness.
Compassionate love: This form of love is marked by trust, affection, intimacy, and commitment.
One sided love: This form of love happens when one person loves another who does not return those feelings.
How to Practice Love
There is no single way to practice love. Every relationship is unique and different, and each person brings their own favour and essence into the mix, history-experience, needs and desires. Some things that you can do to show love to the people you care about include:
Be willing to be vulnerable.
Be willing to forgive.
Do your best, and be willing to apologize when you make mistakes.
Let them know that you care.
Listen to what they have to say, always.
Prioritize spending time with the other person.
Reciprocate loving gestures and acts of kindness.
Recognize and acknowledge their good qualities and focus on them in the worst of times.
Share things about yourself and be open.
Realize when the one you love is having a difficult time and do your best to not upset them more.
Show affection: physical and with words and deeds.
Make it unconditional.
Tips for Cultivating Love
Lasting relationships are marked by deep levels of trust, commitment, and intimacy. It is a consciousness.
Some things that you can do to help cultivate loving relationships include:
Try loving-kindness meditation. This is a technique often used to promote self-acceptance and reduce stress, but it has also been shown to promote a variety of positive emotions and improve interpersonal relationships. It involves meditating while thinking about a person you love or care about, concentrating on warm feelings and your desire for their well-being and happiness.
Communicate. Everyone's needs are different. The best way to ensure that your needs and your loved one's needs are met is to talk about them. Helping another person feel loved involves communicating that love to them through words and deeds. Some ways to do this include showing that you care, making them feel special, telling them they are loved, and doing things for them.
Handle conflict in a healthy and productive way. Hardly arguing or bickering is not necessarily a sign of a healthy relationship—more often than not, it means that people are avoiding an issue rather than discussing it. Rather than avoid conflict, focus on working on issues in ways that are healthy in order to move a relationship forward in a positive way. Understand your needs and theirs and take them both into account.
Understand each others needs and how each of you operates and ticks...take the quiz from '5 love languages' its very insightful to realize your differences and expressions. Learn More About Yourself (5lovelanguages.com)
Here is an important truth...we are only able to give love at the level of consciousness we hold. At times, it may feel like a partner or family member doesn’t love you, but that may not be true. In their mind, they may love you with everything they have. Yet, this love may only be taking place on an unconscious level. Perhaps its time to work on things together by learning to understand each other more and better. Try the 5 love language quiz above, try to understand yourself more and get out of your own way to love yourself more. How to love yourself more Be willing to take responsibility in your own emotions and behaviors. Seek help or advice. Learn about your own emotions and beliefs that cause you pain. Raise personal consciosuness and vibration by diving into meditation and breathwork and to commune with your higher guidance/intellegence. It is within you to seek and find. Take a step forward to improve your own inner workings and how loving you are to yourself and others. Take the steps forward to discover the truths and how loving actions can bring peace and a better sense of worth. Over time, you will realize and discover that improving love and self-love improves EVERYTHING in your life and personal well-being. This in turn aids in your ability to manifest a more loving beautiful, peaceful, passion filled - CONSCIOUS life.